


The way the turtle falls

by FullMetalNinja75



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012)
Genre: Depression, Family Feels, Mutation, Self-Hatred, Torture
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-27
Updated: 2017-09-27
Packaged: 2019-01-06 02:01:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12201663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FullMetalNinja75/pseuds/FullMetalNinja75
Summary: Donnie was captured by the shredder for weeks, by the time his brothers rescue him its too late. he was broken...2012





	1. Chapter 1

**Um** **hey** **dudes** **!!** **This** **is** **my** **new** **story** **!** **Done** **complete** **in** **our** **favourite** **genius** **point** **of** **view** **...** **Um** **yeah** **I** **hope** **you** **like** **this** **chapter** **!!** XD  
  


I c _losed_ _my_ _eyes_ _as_ _the_ _pain_ _hit_ _..._ _Make_ _it_ _end_ _..._ _My_ _tear_ ducts _were_ _already_ _bone_ _dry_ _..._ _My_ _sobs_ _echoed_ _in_ _my_ _head_ _..._ _I'd_ _been_ _here_ _too_ _long_ _..._ _Lost_ _too_ _much_ _blood_ _..._ _No_ _one_ _was_ _coming_ _..._ _Or_ _they_ _would've_ _found_ _me_ _a_ _month_ _ago_ _..._ _I_ _was_ _gone_ _..._ _Still_ _alive_ _..._ _But_ _dead_ _at_ _the_ _same_ _time_...

 

"Come on D!" Mikey laughed shoving from out my lab. "Patrol!" His palms dug into my shoulders, which he undoubtedly was on his tiptoes to reach.   
"Mikey," I began impatiently. "I can't... I'm doing a delicate experiment."  
"You can do that after." Mikey said firmly, then looked directly at him. I sighed.   
"Puppy dog eyes won't work... I'll join you guys after, k?"   
"Promise?" Mikey half growled. I smiled.  
"Yes." I grinned. Mikey's eyes almost immediately lit up, almost like stars. Intensely light blue, sticking out like pizza on my tool belt... Don't ask how pizza gets on my belt, Mikey is all I'm going to say. Looking back on that night I should've gone with them, I would've been safe...

 

************************************

 

"Alright," I muttered to myself. "Just gotta find the guys." I hoped on a building to see if I could find my brothers. Couldn't hear any sound of kraang blasters, so they are weren't finding Kraang... No shouting Rahzar... I hopped over a few blocks, scanning for the sight of my brothers. Even though they were ninjas I knew they places we his and all the tricks used to fool you guys. Not telling you how us professional ninja hid I searched. I smelt around the city, I don't get the purpose of the nose, turtles don't have noses and we get around fine. Its more of another place to get hurt...

 

My hands brushed across the wall, I could see fresh gun marks on the wall... Ice melting, Tiger claw... I should've gone back then, by that time it had been an hour I'd looked for them. I don't know why I was so determine to find them, in the whole city. I had already passed all our main spots... Then again Mikey was waiting for me. He was the only person I felt still cared, in my tumbling world...

 

I followed the tracks I'd found to an alleyway. I pulled back the urge to shout out to my brothers. Something was wrong... Something was very wrong. My heart immediately sped up, why? Why did I continue to walk? Why was I so stupid that day? I lowered my breathing, and took slow steps, no sound. Complete ninja mode.   
"I told you he would come." Tigers Claw's voice growled in my ear. My legs froze, I needed to run... Why couldn't I? Five people surrounded me, Tiger Claw, Bepop, Rocksteady, Rahzar and Fish Face.  
"Aw its only one!" Bebop groaned.   
"But there will still the smashing." Rocksteady smiles, slamming knuckles into each other. It was trap, why couldn't I see that? I pulled out my staff, I should've run, run far away, it was better to be tired out then to be beaten to a pulp. I thought I could take them, maybe end my life, I'd deal with that. I'd go down fighting. I wasn't go down that at all that night. At least not the way I thought. Fish Face's leg slammed into my chest. I slid back. Okay Donnie that didn't matter. I ran up and slammed my staff into Bepop's neck.   
"Oh! That's nasty!" He groaned, then ducked I didn't know why until Tiger Claws fist smashed into the side of my face. The taste of blood filled my mouth, my vision fuzzed up and black dots danced.   
"Uh." My knees buckled. Talk about a bad ending. I weakly swung my leg at the shape of Rahzar.   
"Fish Face, Rahzar go find the others." Tiger Claws voice rose over the high ringing in my ear.   
"And us Tiger Claw?" Rocksteady asked. I tried to punch the large rhinoceros. Bepop laughed.   
"Kinda weak huh?"   
"Yes, I lot weaker than in brothers," Tiger Claw purred. "Rocksteady, grab Donatello. Master Shredder will have fun with him..." My vision my growing darker, rough hands pulled around my waist. I felt light... Why wasn't I fighting? Because I was weak... Not anymore. Now I was stronger.

Now no one could hurt me... Because I learned my lesson. Family was useless, I was on my own, no one to trust, nobody can hurt you if you don't trust them in the first place...

**Our** **poor** **Donnie** **!!** **its** **alright** **D!** **We** **still** **care** **!** **Anyway** **I** **hope** **you** **liked** **my** **new** **book** **idea** **!!** **Yep** **!**   
**kudos** **/** **comment** **/** **follow**   
**-** **Ninja** **out**

 


	2. Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> torture poor donnie wah

I panted running forward, Tiger Claw laughed.

"Faster!" He growled, an ice bullet shot passed me. I yelped out, speeding up.  
"Tiger Claw make him fight some robots, that'll really tire him out." Rahzar joined in. Tears started to blur my sight as a zap filled my body. I cried out, arms grabbing at the metal collar on my neck.   
"Weakling." Fish Face hissed at me. I said nothing, keep the pain in my chest. Fish Face pulled a needle out, my heart sped up, I needed to run! I tried to pull up, Fish Face's metal foot dug into my plastron, I could feel blood force up my throat. My hands clawed into the concrete ground, my blood helplessly dropped down. Laughter pounded in my ears. Pain shot into my arm, effects immediately hit. The walls started to spin around me, numbness filled my body, I tried to look around, grip what was happening. Was I dying? No, the little sense I had told me they were putting me to sleep... Why?! Before I could answer my question I was knocked down out.

 

"Wake up." Raph growled,  kicking me. I groaned.  
"Go away Raph." I curled further into my arms, from the cold ground I must of fell out of my bed, the nightmares. Torture... I shuddered.  
"I am not Raphael." The voice sounded deep, my eyes shot open, that wasn't Raph's voice. My eyes met cold walls, it wasn't a nightmare, it was reality.  
"Get up." Tiger Class growled, my ribs were screaming, probably kicked during my sleep. I nodded, not risking the fear of further punishment. Running, I was done running, stand to fight.

Tiger Claw threw my staff at me, I grabbed easily, twirling it comfortably through my hands. It seemed to calm me. Knowing I had my weapon in my hands. My element. I drew in a breath, what were they planning now? My question was answered immediately.  
"We have some new bots, hopefully you'd help us test them." Tiger Claw smiled, I nodded, forcing my mouth shut. No words, no pain, they know nothing if I say nothing. I was forced into a black carpeted room, I definitely never been here all those times we'd broken into Shredder's lair. The walls were thick, my eyes caught on the hidden cameras around the room, the corners, guns. My heart wouldn't stop beating.  
"Maximum turtle smashing." Rocksteady laughed, don't shake, weakness. No weakness, it was dangerous to show. Doors in the side opened, I could hear the buzz of robots, Immediately pulled into battle stance. What other weapons did I have? I felt around my belt, great my shuriken were gone.  Red light came from the side walls. I closed my eyes, plan.

Silence, I didn't expect that. Lights dimmed, almost nothing. Was this the kind of thing Splinter has tried to train us for? Open the ears, nothing. My ears reached to grip any movement. A metal fist smashed across my cheek, pain flared up, I put out a foot to stabilize myself. A breath was pulled into my throat. Focus Donatello, I closed my eyes, blocking out the small red lights in the corners. I lowed my breathing, no sound. Full ninja mode. 

My ears picked up on the slightest foot, another breath, my hands is position, the light bo' felt so right in my large hands. Feet spread out, ready to kick.... BANG! The robot burst out, my eyes opened quickly enough for me to see my blade stab at the red and black AI. (Artificial intelligence) I grinned as the lights forced back on. 

"Not so tough Shredder." I taunted. Bad mistake. 

"Enough! Karai, take Donatello back to Stinkaman's lab." Shredder growled through the speakers. I shuddered, his lab? The doors opened, Karai marched through twirling a pair of handcuffs in my hands. 

"I called Leo." She hissed, roughly putting on the cuffs. I nodded, my heart starting to relax. Haha, yeah, I thought they would come. Too long they took...

 

***************************************************

 

"Donaaatello" Stinkman stumbled over my name, I was strapped to a large board, tried to fight. No use. 

"Mazzter Sheddder, what do I mutated him into?" Stinkman asked, NO!! I tried to fight. I couldn't...  no! 

"O," Fish Face walked in. "Were you not informed of your double mutation?" He laughed, handing the evil scientist a jar of DNA. Please no, I was dreaming. This wasn't happening. Rahzar circled me, smiling. He mixed some mutagen with the DNA in a syringe. 

"Holzd himzzz down." Stinkman instructed to the two other mutants. 

"So Donatello, would you enjoy being a mutant turtle, bird and fish?" Fish Face asked, tears sprung to my eyes, pain hit my shoulder...  
  


I screamed out, the straps broke over me. Blankness covered my eyes. Foot steps told me I was being backed off. Breathing suddenly became really hard, pain shot off my back. Some on started to place a tube in my mouth, air! wait, water? I could hear laughing.  When my vission cleared I could see Karai above me, scared disgust, curiosity was taped over her face. 

"Good job Stockman." I could hear The Shredder praise. My eyes darted across the room, everyone smiling... why?! What did I look like? Fish Face dragged a mirror at me. NO!! not like this, I couldn't look like this! Generally i'd be scared of April's reaction, now it was my brothers. My face had two tears on the side, gills. A black tube was placed in my mouth to help me breath. Light skin was connected in my fingers, out of my shell were large black and brown wings, they curled over me. My shoulders were covered with feathers. I couldn't shaking.  This couldn't be real!! I spread out my wings, fly away! I tried to leap up. The electric collar zapped me, I forgot about that. WHY?! Why was this happening to me?! 

"What you think?" Rahzar growled in my ear. I sobbed, no. I didn't ask for this! why was this happening? 

"No," I sobbed. "Change me back." 

Shredder laughed. "I don't think that would be happening soon. Bepop, Rocksteady take the freak home." First my heart lifted, home? no he meant my cell. 

"Haha!" Bepop laughed, he re-cuffed me. My wings were heavy, I tucked them around my shell. If I did this on purpose I would've spent hours pouring over books, learning to fly grasp what was happening in my muscles and new feathers. No. No more old life.... now I was really a freak...

**aww poor donnnie! he's been triple mutated BTW....:(**


	3. Finding Donnie and loosing him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is long...2000words! well long to compared to what i usually write...

Pain, that in one word is what I felt. I found curling my wings over my shell was the best way to hold them. My new gills were weird, occasionally one of Shredder's hench men would in to change my water, I was a fish. The words sounded so wrong, I was too scared to let them slip out my mouth. Bird, from my wings I concluded I was a Bueto playtptures or Broad Winged Hawk. My turtle features were still strong, feet barely changed, still large, but small claws came off my toes which were slightly thinner. The feathers on my shoulders were dark brown, blending into my thinner,lighter green skin. Some parts of my fingers were in chips, scales. Leading to my webbed hands. The underwings were white. Some part of me longed to be free, the sky, I needed a small fresh water pond... Rahzar placed a mirror in my cell, just to see how much of a freak I was...

 

Karai walked into my cell, she held a largish water container, I nodded and took in a large breath of water.  
"In India,Oscar will tango while playing golf in a hotel in November." The words slipped from her mouth. I frowned. It made no sense, course it didn't... A code! I smiled at the snake mutant, her brown eyes glinted. Once she left a felt free to 'breathe' in the water. Right, so a word code. I replayed the words... India, tango, hotel... Phonetic alphabet! India, was I... Oscar O, tango T, golf G, hotel H, November N...  
"What...?" I asked out loud..  
"What,What?" Rahzar asked. I bit back my lip.  
"What... What's going to happen to me?" I asked. Rahzar laughed.  
"That doesn't matter, you won't live much longer..." The words hit me... I didn't want to die, not yet. So many things I wanted to make... Keep back on track, it'll be alright. No it wasn't.  
Hmmm.... I racked my brain, good thing I didn't become dumber because of my mutation. Tonight!!Yes!! It made sense, although one T, probably couldn't fit in another tango, I remember I forced Leo to learn it in case we needed to send out messages. So he actually remembered...

 

Tonight, that seemed forever away, and my day torture was still coming. Just a few hours you can make it through that. Come on. I could, but that wasn't the end... I always viewed myself a realist, looking back I was really optimistic thinking they would come and save me. Thinking I'd be alright...

 

Screams echoed as I banged on the cage.  
"Please." My legs broke under me, I felt my body drop. Fish Face grinned, stabbing the taser into my plastron. Electricity surged through. I spat out my water tube, that was dangerous. At the time it seemed a smart idea, it was horrible. Water, air I needed it. The red mutant laughed.  
"I don't think you deserve this back." My sight blurred as I clawed at him. Black dots.  
"Give it back, this isn't the worst." Rahzar shrugged, his claws ripped open my mouth to stuff it in. Don't let the tears come, can't let them fall...

 

*******************

 

I hunched in the corner, trying to regain my breath. No light, I couldn't see how long my family would take.  
"Shh," Leo hissed. "Karai said he'd be around here some where." My heart lifted. They came, I was going to be alright.  
"Dude, there's a shadow of there"  
Mikey whispered. My ears told me above me, yes they were close.  
"Raph you go." Leo whispered.  
"No, I ain't asking some stranger if he's seen our brother. My wings were folded over me, they probably thought I was a mutant bird.  
"He is here," I said loudly. They hopped down. "If your looking for Donatello."  
"Um," Leo asked. "Do you mind telling us where?" I drew in a breath, that just proved it. I was so freaked up my own brothers couldn't recolonise me. My mouth felt dry.  
"You're looking at him." The sob was hard to hold back. Leo's face broke.  
"Oh... Donnie, what did they do to you?" He and Raph knelt down, allowing me to put my arms around there shoulders. I couldn't hold myself, I just allowed myself to fall into my older brothers arms. Raph smiled at me. Pity, I could see it. There eyes shone with it.  
"They... They tripled mutated me." My wings ached so I pulled them out, every bone stretching far as possible.  
"Woah!" Mikey shouted.  
"Turtle, bird." Leo counted off my animal parts.  
"Fish." I finished, showing my webbed hands in the small lights.  
"You'll need a new mutant name!" Mikey said excitingly. I shook my head.  
"Or I can just stay with my old name?" I moaned, my legs were too weak to run. I felt Raph lift me up and take me to the back of his shell.  
"Its alright bro'" Raph whispered. I nodded into his shell.

 

Once we got into the Shell Razor Raph set me on my chair.  
"So what should you be?" Mikey asked excitingly. "Super..." He grinned.  
"I don't want a new name!" I shouted, Mikey jumped.  
"I'm... I'm sorry dude." Mikey sunk into his chair. My heart flipped.  
"I'm sorry Mikey," I muttered. Raph's face was pale. "Look, truthfully I'm scared. That escape, it was too easy. I mean it's Shredder! I don't know which reality you've been living in but... I..." All three sets of eyes were set on me. "I just can't take this." I bowed my head. They knew the truth now.  
"Its alright D!" Mikey smiled, putting an arm around me, I could feel my feather ends dig into me. "You don't need a new name! It's just tradition, and I thought you'd want to!" He explained. He was trying, he really was. I could hear it in his tone. But cheering me up wasn't going to happen easily...

 

When we got back I slipped to my room.  
"I just need space." I pleaded. Leo nodded. "Sure"  
"I'll bring dinner in later? What you want on your pizza?" Mikey asked. Leo must of read my pleading look. "How about you make something simple Mikey? And I think some clean water," Leo smiled, nudging my tube.  
"Yeah I'll need to upgrade this." I turned around.  
"Donnie!" Raph shouted. I gave a silent annoyed sigh.  
"Yeah?" I asked quietly, his hand gripped my shoulder tightly.  
"We're here for you bro'.' He promised. I nodded.  
"OK." my voice came out a scared whisper. Raph's eyes were relaxed and attempting comfort. I allowed a smile to slip.  
"Don't stay in your room forever." Leo smiled, he waved me off.

 

Three days.  
It was peaceful, but painful. Waterbottles were placed outside  
my door.  
"I don't know how much you'll need." Leo explained nervously. I grinned.  
"It's alright." I promised, taking the liquid to my bedroom.  
"Sensei, wants to speak to you." He said. I flinched, Master Splinter? I drew in a breath of water, my gills absorbed the oxygen. I smiled as my new organs relaxed, half of me wanted to cut me up to see my new body make up, no more lungs...  
"Only became it's Master Splinter." I said slowly, Leo smiled.  
"Yeah, he won't bite." He laughed. I rolled my eyes.  
"Its only been 2 weeks since I've seen him I'm not going to forget that." I stumbled out.

 

"Donatello." Splinter greeted me. His arm reached out, placing a paw on my curled wings. His eyes scanned my change.  
"Father?" I asked. Splinter hid his face.  
"Donatello, Leonardo informed me of what happened under Shredder's custody. I bowed.  
"Hai sensei." Splinter studied my face. For once I didn't try to hide it, Splinter was the one person I still really trusted. Yesterday I over heard Leo and Raph talk about Casey and April. They were at the farm house together, dating... Mikey was trying to keep me happy, Raph tried to help, but he wasn't the best person you'd go to after an experience like the one I'd felt... Leo kept his distance, lucky.  
"You have been keeping distant from us," I nodded "we're your family, you cannot ever forget that," I said nothing. "That is why I want you to go on patrol with your brothers tonight."  
"No!! No disrespect sensei but I can't! I'm too weak! I'll get pumled in a fight."  
"I did not say you had to fight, I simply said to join them, and you have to spend the rest of the day with them." I frowned, generally I'd be fine with that, it would be Raph complaining and growling about some excuse or another.  
"Hai." I said reluctantly, bowing.

 

*********************

 

So that's the story of how I found myself sitting on the floor of the lounge room, my wings half spread out. Mikey pulled some board games out, laying it on a table Leo found in the sewers yesterday. It had a light scratched pink coat, legs had several chips into it. I smiled.  
"What we playing?" I asked, Splinter's words rushed over me, this was my family.  
"Monopoly, Cluedo, Panic um... Scrabble."  
"Aww we all know who wins those games." Leo laughed groaned. I allowed a smile.  
"It's really easy, it just one word. Strategy."  
"That, and Mikey's really easy to bribe." Raph laughed.  
"I am not!!" Mikey protested.  
"Fine, you can't have this entire pepperoni, jellybean and jalapeño pizza to yourself if you give me your first monopoly." Raph smiled.  
"Really?!" Mikey grinned.  
"No! Raph, just play, I'll deal the money." Leo gave his I'm the leader better listen to me look.  
"You do it too Leo." Raph grumbled, picking up his piece in his hands.  
"Yeah, but I do it in a more strategical way, Donnie too." Leo admitted in a low voice.

 

"Seriously dude?!" Mikey shouted as I layer down my three sets. "How?! Every time!! Not fair." Mikey kicked his money across the floor.  
"Hey! Getting angry for no reason is my thing!" Raph growled, slamming a foot into the table. Splinters flew lightly off. Leo bit back his lip.  
"Or you guys can just forget the fact that Donnie is seriously smarter than everyone here." He shrugged, if I wasn't as smart as I was I would've thought they lost to make me feel better.

 

"That's not a word!" Mikey shouted, coming into the room, green cup cakes on a tray.  
"Is that edible?" Raph asked in disgust.  
"I don't know? But that word does not exist." He looked at my word spelled across the Scrabble. I smiled. "Yeah it is."  
"That shouldn't be allowed! Not long words!" Mikey placed down the food.  
"Just leave it alone, it's English, not Japanese." He looked at Leo, who earlier decided to write _Kame_ _,_ the Japanese word for turtle. Leo rolled his eyes.  
"What ever, just like Raph said let's keep playing... That'll be twenty-three points... Yep another high number from Don." Leo muttered, marking down the paper.  
"Donnie take a cup cake!" Mikey demanded, shoving the horribly decorated 'cake' at my face.  
"Um, does a spew bag come with this?" I asked, giving a light smile. Leo smiled back.  
"Year sure I'll go check?" He pretended to stand up.  
"Hey! I'm not that bad!" Mikey shouted, angry blush coveted his cheeks.  
"I'm just kidding." I said gently, trying to get rid of my smile. "So when's April and Casey getting home?" I asked, pulling up facial muscles.  
"Oh... You heard that?" Leo looked scared. "I'm sorry, we should of told you... I guess." Leo struggled to think what to speak.  
"It doesn't matter." I said impatiently, try to hide it. Don't see my face. I curled my wings up, dropping my head down.  
"Donnie?" Raph asked.  
"I'll be fine! Its just a girl." I growled.  
"No its not," Leo lightly messaged the top bend of my wings which felt soothing.  
"Yeah D, you deserve way better than April." Raph smiled.  
"She won't even like me now, I'm a freak of nature." I muttered.  
"No your not!" Mikey shouted immediately. Leo and Raph looked at me confused.  
"Why would you say that? You never said that before?" Raph frowned.  
"That's be cause it didn't matter before, least I looked like something, now I look like some experiment gone wrong, only its not..." I trailed off.  
"Your Not A Freak," Mikey said firmly looking me straight in the eye. "Call yourself that and I'll slap you." He said.  
"Why?! I am?! I..." I was cut off from a slap across the cheek. "Hey!"  
"Donnie please, we want to help," Leo begged. "And we can't do that with out you. Your my little brother, I love you." He said. I nodded. His words hit, I wasn't helping them. Even Raph was mostly keeping in his temper.  
"Sorry." I sobbed.  
"Look it doesn't matter bro' time for patrol," Leo said confidently.  
"Just remember no matter what, we have your back."  
"And your shell, and wings." Mikey laughed.  
"Yeah..." I backed away as Mikey tried to hug me.  
"That's enough for Donnie for the day." Raph roughly grabbed the ends of Mikey's mask.  
"What ever!" Leo shouted, tackle hugging all of us. "I love you little brothers!"

**awwwww fluff!!  i love being able to do when i write a really sad chapter just ending it on a happy note...**

**kudo/comment/follow**

**-Ninja out**


	4. Forget Everything And Run+

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Casril happens...i hate casey...he hurt my donnie

I tapped on my lab table. Voices, "April, Casey!" Leo shouted. My heart dropped, April. Casey, there was no doubt he would rub in my face that he got her. 

"You found Donnie?" April sounded worried, almost scared. Silence.   
"Yeah... But he's... Changed..." Leo said nervously.   
"How?!" Casey shouted, excitement. I wanted to laugh out. Leo's voice dropped, I couldn't understand what he was saying. I couldn't take it, the pounding on my heart.   
"Like this." I spread my wings out, I could see April and Casey quickly break apart. I quickly shielded my eyes from their sight. Casey grinned.   
"Dude!!" Casey shouted. "You look epic!" I folding my wings back.   
"Yeah, that's what you think..." I muttered.  
"Bird turtle man!" Casey grinned.   
"Turtle, bird and fish." I corrected. Casey's eyes widened.  
"That's even cooler! Your so metal!!" Casey's hands reached for my wings, I shot them up, the touch felt so weird against my feathers.   
"Its alright D." Mikey whispered. I said nothing. No it wasn't.

"Who did this to you?" April asked, no eye contact.   
"Shredder." My voice came out disgusted, hate, fear.   
"Oh." Casey's voice dropped.   
"That's right oh!" I snapped. "While you two were busy making out in the farm house I was stuck in Shredder's lair getting tortured!" My voice had ridden over its scared whisper. My heart was slamming against my chest.   
"It's alright now." April's arms started to wrap around me.   
"Get off me!" I growled, pushing myself back.   
"Donnie," Leo said quietly. "Nobody cares if you're more of a mutant."   
"Yeah if anything you're cooler!" Mikey added. I said nothing, the bad thing about us being so close is we knew so much about each other and reading each other facial expressions wasn't hard.   
"We're not trying to flatter you Donnie." Raph smiled, it was genuine. I managed a smile, I wanted to help them, but I how could I when I couldn't help myself?   
"How about some air? We're all stuffy here." Leo decided. I nodded, plus I wanted to try out my wings.

I sprinted to the edge, drawing in some water. It was so much more comfortable than the tube I Wad given in Stinkman's lab. Light almost invisible tubes in my gills, curling behind my shell, hiding inside a small leather box on my modified belt. The good thing about it is I could hide my water supply by curling over my wings. The edge was so full in my view. One mistake, just one and I'll go crashing to my doom... Flying, I'd dreamed of it my whole life my inventions fulfilled my dream, least I thought it had.   
"Donnie! What are you doing?!" Raph shouted, he sounded scared. Oh shell, they thought I was trying to kill myself. I smiled at them.   
"Its alright!" My voice sounded blurred in the thick wind. I stepped off...

The wings caught the wind, the feeling, I can't explain. I felt complete, I pulled my wings into a dive, reaching out my hand to touch my brothers.   
"Your the D man!!" Mikey shouted, arms shooting up. I smiled lifting up my head, I could stay here forever, plus I didn't need air, I got more water before we left on patrol. It should last a couple of hours. Freedom, how I longed for it,you don't understand, you couldn't.

"Dude that was amazing!!" Leo smiled, he reached for my wings. I tucked them info my shell.  
"Now all we need is some kraang and I got a really good night!" Raph commented, I noted on his words. Only the kraang, no foot bots or purple dragons. Both working for the Shredder is name sent a fearful shudder down my spine. I smiled, Master Splinter had been personally training and meditating with me to build up my physical and 'spiritual' strength.   
"Yeah, that would be good." I nodded, pulling out my staff.   
"Looking for kraang!" Casey pulled out his hockey stick. April shrugged, she relaxed her body againsts Casey's, his hands pulled April's tightly. They were together, and I was alone.  
"You'll find someone else." Leo put a reassuring hand on my feathered shoulder.  
"Maybe." I slipped quietly, one day...   
  


"YES!!" Raph shouted, my eye caught the kraang. I pulled out my staff, immediatly I relaxed, its alright Donnie. They can't get with your family here. Casey and April smile at each other, and running to the field. I pulled out my wings, letting them catch the wind as I ran to the seven kraang. 

"BOYAKASHA!!" Mikey laughs, sprinting forward. 

"Come on Donnie its alright." Leo's eyes met mine, I tried for a confident nod. My shoulders were heavily shaking. Raph put an arm around me. 

"Come on bro' its just kraang we can deal with them." Raph's eyes were soft, trying to help me. I nodded. 

"Ok." I sobbed, I was gonna be alright.   
  


"It is the one called Donatello." One human skinned kraang. My body shook, they wanted me... why?! My shaking was pulled in tighter. 

"Yes... the one called The Shredder did the thing called ask for him."

"No." I moaned, my legs started to buckle.

"Donnie!!" Raph's voice blurred in the distance.

"Mikey grab him! we're leaving!" Leo ordered. Hands grabbed me. I didn't want to go back, my wings hit the ground. 

"It's alright D." Mikey soothed. Padding feet pounded in my ears. 

"No its not." I sobbed... my eyes dropped...  
  


"I don't think Donnie's well sensei... what ever happened in there with Shredder..." Leo's voice trailed off outside my door, I felt around my room. Defiantly mine, I fully opened my eyes, light blared out my door.  My heart was hammering... I remembered the battle... I was a coward. So weak.

"Donnie's awake!" Mikey shouted, he jumped in, I pulled myself back how did he know? 

"Donnie!" Leo smiled, opening my door, he sat on my head. "You were moving." He explained. 

"Oh..." I blushed, that was dumb, I mentally smacked myself. 

"How you feeling Donatello?" Splinter looked directly at me, I pulled off my covers. My mask and staff were on my bedside table, and lent across the wall next to me. I fiddled with my T-phone. 

"I don't know sensei..." I bowed my head. "Now the kraang are after me... for Shredder. Sensei I'm scared, I don't want them to get me again." The tears fell. Arms wrapped around me.  

"Your safe here Donnie." Leo whispered in my ear. I nodded. 

"If we do loose you again we'll search the city up and down for you... I promise no matter what. " Raph hugged me the tightest. We all changed that night... I felt it, Raph was softer to me... but I needed it... I smiled. 

"Thank you." I whispered.

 

**i hate that new taylor swift song...look what you made me do...its soo annoying!! shes whining...but its so catchy dammit... *pouts* i really like it....whyyy usaully i can escape those catchy songs..that despa..what ever...it was really annoying song and that dance one in trolls...for those who dont know i love punk/alternative/90s rock FOB! MCR! good charlotte!!**

**kudo/comment/follow**

**-Ninja out**

 


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